Well..

I don't even know what to say anymore. I guess I feel like I've fucked everything up.
I thought I was feeling better, I enjoyed my holiday.. to be honest it was so nice to get away from everything.

Sure I missed people, but it was great to just not have any worries, no sadness, no anxiety. I could just enjoy each day as it came and actually have a geniune smile on my face.

I make so many people miserable, and at the start I do what I think is right.. I try to do whats best for everyone and just end up fucking things up.

I'm not happy, I'm not a good person, I'm not wanting to be here any more.

I guess being back at home brought it back to me and made me realise, so I guess in a way thankyou, for getting my head out of the clouds.

I hate me.